Confessions of a “sort-of” jogger: What Running Taught me About Faith and Healing
I’m a sort-of jogger.
Let me explain.
I go through seasons where I will regularly jog. Sometimes those seasons last months. And then life gets in the ways and i put it on the backburner, until I have another season in my life where it feels like I can make it work again.
But, even though I’m not a hardcore, never-missed-a-run in twenty years kind of jogger, I’ve done it on and off long enough that I’ve learned a few things about it.
Whenever I start jogging after my life has been mostly…ahem…sedentary for awhile (am I typing this devotional while laying on the couch? Possibly…..) it feels like an insurmountable task. Truth be told, I usually don’t start out running. I start out with 20 minute walks.
But after a few weeks of that, my 20 minute walks turn into a 10 minute jog and a 10 mnute walk. After a few more weeks of that, it gets easier and I realize I can run for 20 straight minutes.
Which, for some of you who run half marathons, or full marathons, I realize is not a lot. But for me, it’s a big deal. Especially because I live in bear country which means I’ve run for 20 minutes out on my country road with a chance of meeting up with these wild animals.
Anyways, the point is, the more I do it, the easier it gets.
Except, on the days it gets harder.
Anyone who runs knows what I mean. You’ve been running the same distance for weeks. You’ve felt good. You’ve made progress on your time. And then one day you set out to run and you can barely make it half way through your regular run. What the heck is going on?
The truth is, there can be plenty of things going on. Your body is more tired that day. You didn’t eat enough calories to fuel your run. You could even have a mild virus without realizing it.
It might not be clear what is hindering your usual run. All you know is you are frustrated because it feels like you took two steps back.
Setbacks in Healing
Dealing with grief and healing can be like that. At first it feels like healing isn’t even possible. But then, you start working on it through prayer and reading your Bible and maybe changing some things in your life, and before you know it, you’re making progress. The longer you do it, the easier it becomes.
Until one day something happens – some kind of trigger, and you feel like you went backwards. You question whether you’re healing at all.
But here’s the thing about that setback with running. If I give up the day it’s gotten hard, I will stall my progress (ask me how I know.) But, if I get out there again for my next run, I’ll get back to improving. (again, ask me how I know!) Sometimes that push to get back out there comes from my 13 year old, cheering me on, saying, “Mom, you can do this! I’ll go with you so you don’t have to do it alone!”
It’s the same with grief. You may feel like you are moving backwards, not forwards, but it’s not the end of your story. Healing isn’t a straight line, and setbacks don’t mean failure.
But here’s a very important part: you don’t have to run this race alone. Jesus is with you every step of the way. Just as a good coach (or in my case, a 13 year old child) might watch a runner, encouraging them when they stumble and cheering when they push through, Jesus is there to guide you, strengthen you, and carry you when you can’t make it on your own.
When the run feels impossible, He whispers, “Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).
He doesn’t ask you to pretend everything is fine, or to run perfectly. He asks you to keep showing up, to keep taking the next step, even when it hurts. And let’s be honest here – sometimes it REALLY hurts, so much so, it can be painful just ot breathe.
Jesus can take the setbacks and make them part of your growth. He can turn a day when you feel like you went backwards into a lesson in perseverance, trust, and His sustaining grace. You may not see it in the moment, but He is using each step to shape you into someone who trusts Him more, even when the healing hurts, and even when it doesn’t make sense.
So today, whether your walk turns into a jog or your jog feels impossible, hand the heaviness, the grief, and the frustration over to Jesus. Let Him be your strength when your legs tire and your heart aches. And then, keep moving. You don’t have to move perfectly, just faithfully, one step at a time. Because He is running right alongside you.
